KI = done
BTN = this coming mon
Next...
INDIA...
Suddenly, I realized that I AM SCARED to go to that so-called exotic country.
Reasons;
1) There are only 5 people from my batch going to A.B. Shetty.
It's a very small crowd. And I don't know them much except Dewi.
Can they take my dark humor? sarcasm? and evilness? Judging from what I see at the moment, they all are very nice people (except Dewi maybe) and one of them, seems very quiet. I have no idea how to break the ice. Hmmm...
2) I'll be very far from my loved ones.
Be it my family, friends and yeah, you know it. No need to mention further.
Sometimes, I can't help myself to think why I wanted to study abroad in the first place. I guess this is called pre-fly syndrome. I think it happens to anyone.
The syndrome tends to get worse when I think of only me and 4 others going to the same university *gulps*.
3) The University itself
I know whenever the country India is mentioned, I should always expect the worst. It's not that I'm being negative but that is how things are in that exotic country.
Every time I look at seniors' pictures of the place I'm going, I can't help myself not to feel scared, anxious and emo-ed.
Some more, the thought of only 5 of us going there, is making me more emo-ed.
I think the whole thing that makes me not so eager to go to India is the fact that I have to survive on my own.
I have to stand on my own two feet, carry each burden and get through it for the rest of 5 years ahead.
I'm scared. And sometimes I think, I freak out. A LOT.
I know this will make me stronger and whatever positive things that cross your mind but the process of going through it is very hard.
It's like you want to jump off the cliff, into the sea. I'm like at the edge of the cliff right now, still having doubt whether to jump or not but somehow I will jump because someone will push me from behind.
Yeah, I don't know whether you get the analogy there or not. But that's how I feel right now. It's the same kind of fear.
I feel like i'm going to India alone, on my own. But I guess, it's fated that way. I have to face it no matter what. Maybe Allah has other plans for me that I don't see it right now.
Anyway, enough of emo-ing, that's not going to get me anywhere. LOL.
By the way, I attended KI Graduation Day yesterday at Nilai Spring Resort. It was such a nice place and the food was good. I really had fun taking pictures with my college mates and all but as usual most pictures are in Yasmin's and Jo's cameras. I took very few pictures using my hp camera.
I wore a red saree. Haha. It was my first time wearing it. It was OK. But really have to be careful. I almost tripped at the staircase on the stage!!
Here's the place where the event took place;
Nilai Spring Resort
Me in Saree :)
With Lynthia and Daniel. They are among the people I'm going to miss so much!!!
I'm going to miss Baydah too...
I'm going to miss a lot of other people especially Yasmin and Joanna!! They know me very well. REALLY well I tell you. Lol.
I'm going to miss all the private jokes that I have with my housemates that only us find it funny even though it's very insulting. No kidding!
I know that there will be no other people like them, but I guess, I'll get to know new people of different interesting characters in future, of course life won't be the same as with them but it's OK, when life is taking a different path, I have to adapt myself to it. I can't just stick around to the same old same forever right? :)
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