One more step, then it's time

A-level = done

KI = done

BTN = this coming mon

Next...

INDIA...

Suddenly, I realized that I AM SCARED to go to that so-called exotic country.

Reasons;

1) There are only 5 people from my batch going to A.B. Shetty. 

It's a very small crowd. And I don't know them much except Dewi.

Can they take my dark humor? sarcasm? and evilness? Judging from what I see at the moment, they all are very nice people (except Dewi maybe) and one of them, seems very quiet. I have no idea how to break the ice. Hmmm...

2) I'll be very far from my loved ones.

Be it my family, friends and yeah, you know it. No need to mention further.

Sometimes, I can't help myself to think why I wanted to study abroad in the first place. I guess this is called pre-fly syndrome. I think it happens to anyone.

The syndrome tends to get worse when I think of only me and 4 others going to the same university *gulps*.

3) The University itself

I know whenever the country India is mentioned, I should always expect the worst. It's not that I'm being negative but that is how things are in that exotic country.

Every time I look at seniors' pictures of the place I'm going, I can't help myself not to feel scared, anxious and emo-ed.

Some more, the thought of only 5 of us going there, is making me more emo-ed.

I think the whole thing that makes me not so eager to go to India is the fact that I have to survive on my own.

I have to stand on my own two feet, carry each burden and get through it for the rest of 5 years ahead.

I'm scared. And sometimes I think, I freak out. A LOT.

I know this will make me stronger and whatever positive things that cross your mind but the process of going through it is very hard.

It's like you want to jump off the cliff, into the sea. I'm like at the edge of the cliff right now, still having doubt whether to jump or not but somehow I will jump because someone will push me from behind.

Yeah, I don't know whether you get the analogy there or not. But that's how I feel right now. It's the same kind of fear.

I feel like i'm going to India alone, on my own. But I guess, it's fated that way. I have to face it no matter what. Maybe Allah has other plans for me that I don't see it right now.

Anyway, enough of emo-ing, that's not going to get me anywhere. LOL.

By the way, I attended KI Graduation Day yesterday at Nilai Spring Resort. It was such a nice place and the food was good. I really had fun taking pictures with my college mates and all but as usual most pictures are in Yasmin's and Jo's cameras. I took very few pictures using my hp camera.

I wore a red saree. Haha. It was my first time wearing it. It was OK. But really have to be careful. I almost tripped at the staircase on the stage!!

Here's the place where the event took place;

Nilai Spring Resort

Me in Saree :)

With Lynthia and Daniel. They are among the people I'm going to miss so much!!!

I'm going to miss Baydah too...

I'm going to miss a lot of other people especially Yasmin and Joanna!! They know me very well. REALLY well I tell you. Lol.

I'm going to miss all the private jokes that I have with my housemates that only us find it funny even though it's very insulting. No kidding!

I know that there will be no other people like them, but I guess, I'll get to know new people of different interesting characters in future, of course life won't be the same as with them but it's OK, when life is taking a different path, I have to adapt myself to it. I can't just stick around to the same old same forever right? :)

Money O Money

Yesterday me, Baydah and classmates went to Klang road in order to find outfits for KI Graduation Day.

I was supposed to JUST accompany Baydah there and be her fashion consultant. I WAS NOT supposed to buy anything because I bought saree already, but then, while I was looking around....

I SAW THIS NICE PUNJABI SUIT!

And the salesman offered me a really great discount! 

I was so tempted...

When I get tempted to something, especially clothes, I'll feel the need to try it on. 

So I tried it on....

And OMG, the punjab cun2 fit me nicely pulak! 

Then, here comes the second step, how many  discount can the salesman give?

The price of the punjab was roughly around rm 250...hmmm..

And the salesman said he could give me the punjab only for rm90!!

Amazing...just amazing. It's always like this. Why O Why???

So, end of the story is, I bought the punjabi suit, for rm90 but I'm still going to wear my saree for this coming grad. Huhu.

The guilty feeling that I'm feeling right now, is driving me up the wall. Seriously.

Anyway, here are some pictures of the punjabi suit I bought.

I hope it's worth it =.="

How Many Lemons Can It Be..

People always say that when life gives you lemons, make a lemonade out of it.

But since I have a lot of lemons right now, and so tired of making lemonades already, all i can say is,

"Yea,do whatever you want, i'll just sit here and laugh watching you lemons pile up"


Fool's Garden : Lemon Tree

I'm sitting here in the boring room
It's just another rainy Sunday afternoon
I'm wasting my time
I got nothing to do
I'm hanging around
I'm waiting for you
But nothing ever happens and I wonder

I'm driving around in my car
I'm driving too fast
I'm driving too far
I'd like to change my point of view
I feel so lonely
I'm waiting for you
But nothing ever happens and I wonder

I wonder how
I wonder why
Yesterday you told me 'bout the blue blue sky
And all that I can see is just a yellow lemon-tree
I'm turning my head up and down
I'm turning turning turning turning turning around
And all that I can see is just another lemon-tree

I'm sitting here
I miss the power
I'd like to go out taking a shower
But there's a heavy cloud inside my head
I feel so tired
Put myself into bed
Well, nothing ever happens and I wonder

Isolation is not good for me
Isolation I don't want to sit on the lemon-tree

I'm steppin' around in the desert of joy
Baby anyhow I'll get another toy
And everything will happen and you wonder

I wonder how
I wonder why
Yesterday you told me 'bout the blue blue sky
And all that I can see is just another lemon-tree
I'm turning my head up and down
I'm turning turning turning turning turning around
And all that I can see is just a yellow lemon-tree
And I wonder, wonder

I wonder how
I wonder why
Yesterday you told me 'bout the blue blue sky
And all that I can see, and all that I can see, and all that I can see
Is just a yellow lemon-tree

Kak Eny's Wedding

Finally Kak Eny with Abg Zaini tied the knot today around 11 a.m, in Simpang Pertang, Negeri Sembilan. :)

I feel happy for both of them and may Allah always bless their marriage with happiness, wealth and lots and lots of children!! Just like Tok Kadi. He said he has 15 kids!!

As I mentioned before, I was assigned to become Kak Eny's pengapit. Ambil berkat la kata org :p. Hahaha. Well, it is a good experience to be a part of the wedding, to be so close to the bride and to be there for her when she was nervous during ijab kabul. I could still remember she held my hand tightly during that time. Even I felt nervous for her too! Lol.

Other than that, the wedding went quite well. The food was good! I felt happy! All of us felt happy too! But so tired by the end of the day...

Here are some pictures taken by Kak Aju :)

During nikah..

Awww....

The Sajoli's :)

During sanding...

Kak Eny's brother, Iwan and his girlfriend, Kak Suzee :D

That's me :P. Berangan lebih!
Well, more pictures on fb. Too lazy to upload more here :P

Recent Update

I had an awesome time during Kannada, Hindi and Tamil Nights!

I danced for all the nights and the experience learning how to dance from Parvina and Nora (Both are my sifu) was really great!!

Here are some pictures from Kannada, Hindi and Tamil Nights..

Kannada Night. Didn't take many pictures...

Hindi Night. By the way, I was wearing a modified lengga, borrowed from Loga,

Other than that, in this last month of KI, seriously we still haven't learnt anything much since a lot of activities are going on. Well, I guess, that should be the idea of doing KI. Having lots of fun and do something than sitting in the class, learning (Especially in Miton's class) because I guess we'll have 5 years of that in India later, so, as long as I'm still here, in Malaysia, I just want to spend every minute doing something much more entertaining other than studying. 

I think now is like the great time for me to try out something new, be more adventurous and everything so that later when I'm old, firstly, I'll have great stories to tell my kids or grandkids and secondly, I won't feel miss out or regret for not doing those things because when you're getting older, life tends to get more complicated. So, just enjoy yourself now while you still can!

One thing for sure, I have this dream since I was young, that is, to be a traveler! I want to travel, backpacking, around the world with my friends before I settle down or commit to something. I just feel that I need to see everything on this earth, its beauty and the people living in it. I just hope that later when I'm in India, I'll have this golden opportunity! :)

By the way, today, me and my family will be going to Negeri Sembilan for Kak Eny's wedding, which is tomorrow. Kak Eny is my auntie. I'm so excited! It's been awhile I've been to any wedding ceremonies! 

I heard the food that will be served during the ceremony is Briyani! OH yum yum...

I'll post pictures of the wedding on the next post! :) 

Happy Sunday!

No money, so just shut up and enjoy my stay at home quietly. Lol.

I'm really having a good rest at home this weekend. Had my mum's once-in-awhile-home-cooked-lunch just now. Awww, really miss my mum's home-cooked meals. I think the last time I ate it before today was before I came for KI. Haha.

Have a lot of things happening in my life recently. Busy with KI activities, like last week, I joined for a bowling tournament even though I had no idea how to bowl. I had tremendous fun performing Kannada dance two weeks ago, even though I forgot 1 or 2 steps during the performance. Hehe. 

And next week, I'll be dancing again, for Hindi Night! Yay! This time, I'll dance as a girl! If I'm not mistaken, I'll be a narrator for my class drama as well. What else...oh ya, I looked at the schedule, there's a hospital visit on this Tuesday so I don't really know whether the trip is on or not but hopefully all of us can go there to visit the forensic unit. AWESOME!

Last night, my mum told me an awesome news..I GET TO BE THE BRIDESMAID for Kak Eny's wedding! So I'm very looking forward to this wedding in May :). It's such a great honour to do the duty!

Today, I practiced a new song, The Only Exception by Paramore. Such a lovely song and the strumming pattern is quite easy too. Ohhh, how I wish I know how to do plucking. That will be fantastic!

However, of all these great stuff I've been doing, I miss my friends. A lot. I wish Auw, Jixs and Nad were there too, sharing each of those moments with me. 

Though, I'm still grateful that I still have Baydah, Joanna, Yasmin and Lynthia, always there with me, either suffering or having a good time together. Hahaha.

And I'm going to lose them too soon since we're all going to different parts of India except Baydah and Lynthia perhaps. Hopefully they will go to Manipal Mangalore, then they wouldn't be so far.

Well, people come and go. That's life. I have to learn and adapt myself to changes.

Though, in return, I get to meet some new friends as well :).

*Tibe2 rase emo plak*

Sorry jo, I stole your picture :P